Hungary is a beautiful country: homogeneous, democratic, united, and Christian. These facts are so obviously true that I do not even have to provide sources. My country also has an excellent educational system, which teaches journalists working in the booming and free media sector that sarcasm is not a good linguistic tool to use in an article. Why should I do otherwise?
Although there is only one sad thing about Hungary I have to tell you. It is not the government’s fault, nor does it have anything to do with the aforementioned descriptions of the country. Journalists are also taught not to use empty phrases, so I am fortunate that the government put meaning behind my ill-used phrase of “have to”. I really do have to tell you because of a new proposed law in Hungary.
Do not click that link! That reference does not lead to a source approved by the Hungarian government! You must not click on it! Instead, just pay attention to the herrings. The government is doing its best to let us see more herrings in Hungary. They are wonderful creatures.
I must admit that I am not a biologist, but Hungary is a place of opportunity, enabling people to rise high and even get rich without any proper skills. Now that is equality.
Unfortunately, such equality is not always observed in herrings. I also learned from the Hungarian media how to provide sources for my claims, so here you go. Now you can trust me. I just hope I did not mess up the link, as I am a bit distracted by these fish.
Observe the better herrings as they glisten beautifully in their nakedness (albeit a wholesome, uncontroversial nakedness that does not disturb Hungarian Christian family-friendly norms).
I almost forgot. I have to call attention to how well-dressed our government is on this special occasion, proposing laws to fill the empty phrases of writers with meaning and, by chance, also helping the herring population in Hungary. Viktor Orbán has a new wardrobe just for this occasion. Now he can finally wear it after years of hanging in the closet, something not every government member dares to do (including in a family-friendly way). His new clothes are befitting…
A King of Herrings! I kid you not, there is such a thing. Not a herring per se, but a creature that may be the origin of sea monsters. It swims in front of the herrings, wanting to lead them.
Herrings are free. Some more, some less. Some herrings dare to try to come to other herrings’ habitats. Other herrings are good herrings, such as those in China and Russia. The latter are so free that they have the freedom to visit other herrings and stay as long as they want without being invited. Now that is real freedom.
Sadly, Hungary also has its share of bad herrings. They accept food from faraway places to endanger other real Hungarian herrings. Fortunately, you can tell these bad ones apart if you look closely: they are red. Do not be fooled by saying all fish have the same grayish-blue color. Trust me, there are red ones. By not believing it, you aid and abet the red one and endanger the others.
There are all sorts of bad actors who are baiting the good herrings, feeding them treacherous things, which some swallow hook, line, and sinker. How awful!
I know there might be something fishy about my article, but rest assured, it is only a red herring. How distracting they are.
Continue exploring:
Writing and Written Symbols: Instruments of Freedom
Freedom and the Trap of Identity Politics with Yascha Mounk [PODCAST]