Online abuse is no longer a problem that happens somewhere at the margins of childhood. It is part of the environment in which young people grow up, learn, socialize, and build relationships. Yet, much of this abuse remains unseen — not necessarily because it does not happen, but because young people often do not recognize it, do not report it, or do not trust the systems around them to respond effectively.
The Polish findings of the Seeing the Unseen research project offer a sobering picture. Surveying 800 young adults aged 18–25 about their experiences before the age of 18, the study finds that 51% reported at least moderate exposure to online abuse during childhood. The research also shows that abuse can begin surprisingly early, while becoming more complex and serious as children grow older.
This should force us to rethink how we approach digital safety. The challenge is not simply to protect children from particular online platforms or teach them how to avoid individual threats. It is to build an environment in which children can recognize harmful behavior, understand that it is not their fault, and know where they can turn when something goes wrong.
Abuse Starts Earlier Than We Think
One of the clearest messages from the research is that prevention cannot begin in adolescence. Online abuse was reported already during kindergarten years, with exclusion, shaming, and trolling among the most common experiences. As children moved into primary and secondary school, the nature of abuse changed and intensified. Among 11–14-year-olds, defamation, impersonation and other forms of abuse became more prominent, while among 15–18-year-olds stalking, sharing personal data and identity-related abuse appeared more frequently.
This progression matters. Children do not suddenly enter a risky digital environment when they receive their first smartphone or open their first social media account. Their digital lives develop gradually, and so must our efforts to equip them to navigate them.
Yet digital education in Poland remains fragmented. Only one in four respondents reported having received a dedicated school course on digital or media literacy, while 24% said they had received no digital education at all.
The implication is straightforward: digital literacy cannot be treated as an occasional lesson or a response to the latest online threat. It needs to become a continuous, age-appropriate part of education — covering not only technical skills, but also consent, boundaries, empathy, privacy, relationships, and recognizing abuse.
The Biggest Problem May Be What Happens after Abuse
Perhaps the most troubling finding concerns what happens when young people actually experience abuse. Around 73% of respondents who had experienced online abuse during childhood did not seek help. Shame was the most frequently cited reason, followed by fear of getting into trouble, not considering the situation serious enough, and fear of the perpetrator.
These figures challenge an assumption that often underpins child protection policies: that if children know where to report abuse, they will use those mechanisms. The evidence suggests otherwise.
The problem is not simply a lack of information about reporting channels. It is also about whether seeking help feels safe. Young people said that the most important thing they would want from support was to feel safe and be taken seriously. They wanted the harmful situation to stop and, to a somewhat lesser extent, wanted consequences for the perpetrator.
This tells us something important about the design of support systems. A child who is ashamed, frightened or unsure whether what happened to them “counts” as abuse is unlikely to navigate a complicated institutional process. The first step must therefore be low-threshold, discreet, and reassuring.
Trust Starts With People, Not Institutions
The research also reveals a significant trust gap. When asked whom they would turn to for help, friends were by far the most trusted source, with 57% saying they would definitely seek their help. Parents and caregivers, psychologists, siblings and the police followed. Formal actors such as teachers, helplines and civil society organizations received considerably lower levels of trust. Almost half of respondents said they would not trust schools as a source of help.
This does not mean that institutions are irrelevant. Quite the opposite: it shows how much work they have to do to become credible sources of support.
If young people are more likely to tell a friend than a teacher, child protection systems should not simply instruct them to “report”. They should build bridges between trusted personal networks and professional support. Peer education, trusted adults in schools and highly visible, accessible support services can all help create those bridges.
The finding also gives us a powerful opportunity. Friends are already part of the informal safety network. Young people can therefore be equipped not only to protect themselves, but also to recognize when someone else needs support — and to know what to do next.
From Punishment to Protection
Another important lesson concerns how we talk about online abuse. Polish young adults overwhelmingly reject the most clearly abusive behaviors. More than 70% considered behaviors such as forcing someone to share sexual content, sending sexual images without consent, threatening to kill someone online or sexually editing another person’s photograph completely unacceptable.
But consensus becomes much weaker around “grey areas”: sexualized comments, jokes about sexual orientation, unwanted physical contact or shaming someone for their political views. Only around 43–52% completely rejected some of these behaviors.
This is precisely where education has an important role to play. Prevention is not only about telling children that extreme forms of abuse are wrong. It is about helping them understand boundaries before behavior crosses an obvious line — and giving them the vocabulary to recognize harm when it happens.
Seeing the Unseen
The findings from Poland point towards a broader conclusion: the challenge of online child protection is as much about recognition and trust as it is about technology.
We need better reporting systems, but reporting systems alone will not solve the problem. We need digital education, but digital education cannot be limited to cybersecurity or screen-time advice. We need institutions that respond to abuse, but institutions will remain ineffective if young people do not believe they will be heard, protected or taken seriously.
Most importantly, prevention needs to start early. The fact that online abuse is already reported in kindergarten years means that waiting until adolescence is simply too late. Education about empathy, boundaries, consent, relationships and safe use of digital technologies needs to develop alongside children’s digital lives.
Seeing the Unseen ultimately asks us to look beyond the visible cases — beyond the reports that reach the police, schools or helplines. Behind every reported case there may be many more experiences that were never named as abuse, never disclosed and never addressed.
Making those experiences visible is the first step. The next is building a child protection system that young people actually trust enough to use.
This article draws on the Polish country report of the Seeing the Unseen project, co-authored by researchers from Projekt: Polska. The full report and country reports from the other V4 countries are available here.